- Wrestling the Angel of Repose
1
To build a pyramid which is simply
a very large pile of rocks
you must understand
the angle of repose
where any of us myriad beings
most easily come
to reclining rest, without falling
painfully broken to pieces
with great thundering, crashing
crushings.
2
I’ve always struggled for balance
but only now in my 82nd year
do I understand how all along
the winding way of this
delicious hurtful life
I’ve been in one constant
wrestling match with yet
another Angel. Yes!
Adjusting as I fly out—
Here: such sudden sharp
excruciating angles!
There: to follow this next
sudden impulse or that brief
certainty.
All I’ve ever noticed
before this moment
are the grains of scattered
sand brushed off Your flowing
golden robes. If only
I could see You!
3
Yet every night, I lay
my body down in bed,
pull the blankets over me,
sighing happily in the delight
of letting go this day
I’ve gripped so hard it hurts,
never before understanding
it’s into the arms of the Angel
of Repose I gratefully recline
to be cherished, comforted
and renewed.
11/11/25 - On Wrestling With Mortality: The Angel Speaks
“I will not let you go unless you bless me. ~Genesis 32:27
Finally—I lay on my back
exhausted, unable to rise
as she stood over me. The Mortal
straddled me—in all her ferocity,
her canine viciousness. She rejoiced
in head-shaking exultation
as I smiled up at her. But she did not
understand—I was her explosion of light!
And in the following darkness
she fell and slept in my arms
where she had fallen.
In the morning, I thought,
in the morning I will be earth.
I will be bone.
I will be her beating bloody heart.
But for now in darkness
let my wings
be her dreams.
4/30/1992 to 11/9/2025
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All writings created by me, Susan Fantl Spivack, on this Open Source Singing Frog Press website are licensed under the Creative Commons Attribution (https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-nd/4.0/). Anyone may use and share the unaltered written texts at no charge. Please cite the source as Susan Fantl Spivack, Singing Frog Press (including the link to this website). The photos found on this website (unless otherwise attributed) are the work of Jay Spivack. Anyone may use and share the unaltered photos at no charge. Please cite the source as Jay Spivack/PhotoGraphics, Singing Frog Press (including the link to this website). CC BY-NC-ND 4.0
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